Issue 7: One piece of advice that stuck with this working mom
Paula is the founder of her business, Deploy Contents
Happy New Year, everyone!
Paula is the first international working mom I’ve chatted with and it was wonderful to connect with her. She has one daughter and runs her own content marketing business. It was impressive to hear how she built this business up over the past 8 years. It was also nice to hear that no matter where you parent, some challenges are universal!
Occupation: Founder of Deploy Contents
Children: Regina (3)
Fur children: None yet but wishes for a dog
Location: Buenos Aires, Argentina
Tell me about your business.
I started my business eight years ago. I have a bachelor’s degree in communications and when I was working for companies I was always working in the commercial areas, sales, etc. Then I started working in software development companies and realized that when I write, I can produce good content. So I started on my own with a few clients doing everything from email marketing to blog content and content design. Over time, I realized my differentiator was that I understood what developers wanted to say because I was so immersed in that world. I could translate what they did into something common people understood. So that’s what I specialize in now - helping software companies share how they work and what they do, what technologies they use, and what they can do with technology.
Three years ago when Regina was born I realized I couldn’t do all that by myself, so I started gathering a team. Today I have almost 10 people I work with and some are writers and designers, and just help me with all the things I’m not good at. A year ago I created my brand Deploy and focused on the tech market and it grew. At first, it was hard for me to give my work to others – to delegate – and figure out what other value I could provide to clients. Eventually, I got to see that what I could provide was even better because I could add strategic value. It’s more fun now because I only work on the projects I like.
How do you balance everything without sacrificing life quality?
I think there is no balance. Because you can plan but, at least for me, every day there is some surprise. So for instance, I started allocating some time to work on my body, go back to swimming, trying yoga. Before I became a mom, I was always doing some physical activity. But now it’s very hard to maintain anything for a long time. Sometimes I plan something and she gets sick or she’s very demanding that day. I believe in taking advantage of every little moment that you can.
Something I’ve realized — when you’re feeling overwhelmed and you want to do both things at the same time, like work and answering messages at the same time as being with your kid, that doesn’t work for me. I feel crazy and get angry and you can’t do either of the things well. So I forget about everything on my phone and just spend good quality time with her and when I get back to work, I have a better result with her because she’s more satisfied with the time we spent together and I am, too. I don’t feel guilty that I split my attention. They also notice it - they tell you directly. My daughter tells me directly “leave the phone and look at me!”
So yeah, there is no balance. Some days you will manage and some days you won’t, and you have to cope with that. You can’t do everything perfectly at once.
What’s your family and community like?
I’m fortunate to have a great partner. Everything is so balanced between the two of us. But that’s not common here in Argentina. Most of the burden is on the mom. And I have a nanny who’s here twice a week in the afternoons and my daughter also goes to kinder care every day for a few hours in the morning. During covid, I had a nanny every day for 4-5 hours. My mom also helped a lot, especially when Regina was first born. We also have a house cleaner which helps a lot.
How is parenting in Argentina?
In Argentina, it’s starting to become more common to have a shared partnership between the parents, but it’s not there yet. Women are starting to realize that they can expect their partners to be equal. But I still have a lot of friends who had to leave their work because the nanny was more expensive than what they earned. But there are a lot of influencers out there now who are educating moms and creating content about acknowledging and claiming what their rights are.
Here when the parents are split the dads do not really pay alimony. So moms have to provide by themselves and that can set a ceiling for what they can accomplish. There’s not much balance here yet but we are getting there.
We discussed how the conversation in social media very much may change what parenting looks like 5-10 years from now. Just as millennials have a whole new set of norms about how involved both parents are (and how many dual-working parents there are) compared to boomers, we may see more of this evolution in places where that shared partnership is not as common.
Paula also shared how her partner encouraged her business
It was actually my boyfriend’s idea that I start delegating more. At first, every piece of writing that my team delivered went through me. I edited everything and everything had my point of view on it. He suggested that I start training my writers to edit the content as well. And now I have two editors - one that is like my right hand and I know that I can close my eyes and hand something off and everything will be fine. In one week I’ll be taking my first holiday in eight years and I’m going to try not to think about work!
What do you love about being a mom right now and what’s tough?
Something I’ve been thinking about the past few days is that what I enjoy most is when I become a kid too. You forget how to play and it actually fosters creativity sometimes. And I think they get the best and the worst out of you. You get to know your limits on the good side and the bad side.
I agreed wholeheartedly! I also just love the process of watching a human grow and develop - it’s crazy to me how this person couldn’t do anything two years ago and now he’s sitting around joking and having a whole personality.
Yes - they force you to do what’s healthy and what’s nice. And you want to do that for them and in doing so you do something good for yourself, too.
Do you have any tips or tricks that help you with your work or parenting?
At work, I’m giving a talk soon, about getting out of your comfort zone. I think that’s a good tip to learn something new, maybe get into a new group, secure a new client, etc. If you get out of your comfort zone maybe you’ll learn something new.
With your kid - hmmm I’m not sure – I don’t really know how to be a good mom.
I hardly believe that!
I always remember this one piece of advice I saw on social media. When you’re with your kids, look at their hands. Sometimes you forget and you start treating them like adults but when you look at their hands you remember how little they are and you get perspective.
Paula turned this question back to me and I shared that I’ve gotten a lot better at prioritization, especially at work. I used to be someone who could just work all day every day and I’ve had to set better boundaries which forces me to be more efficient at work and also make time to do other things, for myself and my son.
That reminds me of a time - I was preparing breakfast for my daughter and I did my best for that. And then I dropped her off at kinder care and came home and just ate something quickly for myself and started working. And at one point I realized, I should dedicate the same time for my own breakfast as I do for her, and that helped me start my days off better.
A final tip from Paula on parenting
It’s important to not listen to opinions from outside your house. I mean you can listen but not take them too seriously because they can be judgy and they don’t know what’s really going on. For example, this happened with my dad who wanted me to raise my child a certain way but everything is evolving, right? Things are changing from generation to generation and you see a lot of content about how to raise kids but at the end of the day you need to figure out what works for your kid and your family and it probably won’t be the same for another kid and their family.
What’s one question you have for other working moms?
How is a normal business day structured? How many hours of a day do you work and how many do you share with your family?
How do you manage to make mid or long-term plans by having a family with toddlers or babies?
Thanks for reading this issue of Working Mom. If you enjoyed this post, tell a working mom friend!
Wishing everyone a productive January!
Bhavika